Friday, October 9, 2009

Barry Humbling Award

[Rahm] "Sire, wake up! You've won the Nobel Peace Prize"

[Obama, semi-alert] "No bell pees? How bells did I have to pee over to win that?" [rolls over, back to sleep]

[Rahm] "Sire! You won the Nobel Prize! AND the Stanley Cup!"

[Obama, alert] "Stanley Cup? Don't be mocking my momma!"

[Rahm] "No, sire! You've won the NHL championship, and the Nobel Prize!"

[Obama] "The NHL is just a bunch of toothless white guys, kinda like Arkansas. Screw them. But the Peace Prize, that sounds kinda cool."

[Rahm] "We must get you to Oslo, ASAP. I've already prepped the plane."

Later, in Norway, addressing the crowd...

[Obama] "I'd like to thank the academy..."

[MichelleO, snatching microphone from Barry] "Imma let you finish, but first, I need to say, that for the first time in my adult life, I am proud of the Nobel Committee." [Gives mike back]

[Obama, head swelling slightly] "I am extremely humbled by all this."

[Head swelling more, halo getting tight] "When I bomb people in Pakistan, I do it only in the most humane and painless ways"


[Head getting bigger, halo stretched taut] "And I only rendition jihadis to moderately savage countries for interrogation. And I think I may even address global poverty by building my brother a slightly larger mud hut."


Head now impossibly big, almost proportionate to ears. Halo can't cope and explodes, sending little bits of hopeychange all over front row of audience, just like a Gallagher show.

[Obama] "So, in closing, I must return to the USA and continue my dismantling of a once-great nation."

[Thunderous applause]


  1. Funny stuff, Innominatus. I'd imagine his head is SO SWELLED now, it looks like a hot air balloon...and we know he is SO full of hot air, he can heat the east coast for 25 winters! Nice pic too, did you make it?

  2. Found a pic on Google Images of Barry getting some kind of scarf thingy being put on him by those two dudes - I think it was from commencement at Notre Dame. Then I just fiddled around to make the halo and flava flav medal.

  3. Who knew that "just words, just speeches" could win you a peace prize. This definitely qualifies as joke of the day.

  4. "dismantling of a once-great nation"

    Just one of the many new criteria for the prize.

  5. I loved looong time Michelle snatching up the Mr Microphone!!! Too good! "For the 1st time in my"...BWAHAHAHAhahaha!!!

  6. the little bits of hopeychange and the Gallagher show did it for me! So Dang Funny!

    And every time I hear them invoke Jimmy Carter, I always add in my head, "...after his failed presidency..."

  7. Good one innominatus. I would think that his head has some hyper-dimensional capacity for growth.

  8. You never fail to make me laugh ... thank you Sir.


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