Monday, September 21, 2009

Things that are Awesome

Shock Diamonds. Those are the supercool patterns formed in the exhaust of a jet engine on afterburner. They look extra good at night. I'd find you a pic of shock diamonds at night, but I'm too lazy. Do it yourself.


#2. Pepper bacon. Bacon has become fashionable. Lots of people blog on the wonders of bacon, but they overlook the coolest bacon of all - thick bacon with lots of pepper on it. I love God and try not to disagree with Him, but I think He should have told the Jews "Bacon is OK, just cook it real good." I'd cook you some pepper bacon, but I'm too lazy. Do it yourself.


#3. Top Fuel dragsters. I admit to not being a real huge fan of drag racing - I have no idea who's leading the points or any of that kind if trivia. But I've seen the races live a few times, and the power is amazing. Something that is never forgotten. It is also oh-so-American in its blatant overkill - Build an 8000hp car to race for less than 4 seconds and then rebuild the engine between rounds 'cuz the power is so violent that the motors can only last for one 1000 ft dash. They used to race 1320 feet (1/4 mile), but the speeds were becoming excessive and guys were dying in the crashes. I guess getting crossed up and hitting a guardrail at 300mph is somehow a lot safer than hitting a guardrail at 330mph. Anyway, I'd look up whose car that is, but I'm too lazy. Do it yourself.


#4 High kicks. Does ordinary boxing now seem utterly boring? That's because they don't allow high kicks. Or any kicks, for that matter. How lame. I don't know whose foot is striking whose face. Referring to dental records will likely prove useless for the kickee. I could still probably dig that info up, but I'm too lazy. Do it yourself.


#5. I'm too lazy to come up with something awesome for #5. Do it yourself.


Family-friendly phrasing heartily encouraged.


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...