Friday, November 18, 2011

And I don't even drink!

I gotta serious case of flask envy going on, and I don't even drink!  As an engraver, personalizing a hip flask for a customer is pretty common.  Usually they are groomsman's gifts, other times it is an overzealous frat boy or the like.  Most of them are 5 to 8 ounces.  This one is 64!  Half a flamin' gallon!  Never seen anything like it.  And I shudder to think what kind of hip it is intended to accompany...

[fighting temptation to link a pic of MichelleO]

[fighting temptation to link pic of Debbie Whatshername Schultz]

[temptations overcome.  narrowly...  (unlike their hips) ]


  1. Fighting temptation to mention one of Spinal Tap's biggest hits.

  2. That is one big dang flask! I don't drink, too, but gaaah, that would hold a lot of Dr Pepper, and you'd look like a REAL freakin' Dr swiggin' from THAT monster!

    Whew...I have flask envy now, as well, also!

  3. Big canvas to work with, no?

    Also, alcoholism for the win.

  4. Not a drinker, eh Inno? You must have flunked "Drunkeness 101" at OSU, a core requirement in Corvallis, since there's nothing else to do there except drink and get rained on.

    And yes, this flask was designed for Michelle Obama's right haunch. A haunch, of which could feed a battalion of Marines for three weeks if they were ever stranded for the winter on the Donner Pass.

  5. Gordon - give in to the dark side

    aA - Dr. Pepper also gives me bazooka belches that rattle windows. Win/win.

    Six - I smell the blood of a drunken fool!

    KS - No kidding! Too bad they only want three initials on it. They should unbind their wallet and let me go nuts on it with an engraving of a frat guy puking over a handrail.

    Fredd - Let's not confuse "I don't even drink" with "I've never been drunk." Done plenty of it. I aced 101 and was in contention for a Rhodes (or is it Blows?) Scholarship for Advanced Boozing. Which is why I haven't messed with the stuff since '99.

  6. Um...actually, that's not a flask. It's a fuel tank.

  7. A grateful nation thanks you for resisting temptation.

  8. I had a flask like that. Very hard to hide under my jacket at work. People kept asking me if it was a tumor and I said, wait for it.......wait for it.....

    IT's NOT A TUMOR!(pronounced Tuuuu-Mah.)

  9. A frigging fuel tank...LOL Max. Although it is about the right size to look normal on Mooch's a$$.

  10. That flask on Shelly's hip would be as a pebble is to Rainier. Or Hood.

    (Note the Pac-NW analogy)

  11. WOW, that would hold an extra large bottle of Beefeater ... I'm jealous.

  12. Inno, I'm curious what 3 initials are go be engraved. I'm sure that's probably engraver/customer privilege or something, but something shot through my mind.

    I was thinking, well...I'd better not type it out, this being a family friendly glob and all.

    Heh! Word verification: liteduck


  13. MAX - Is it 100 octane or 100 proof?

    Moogie - I should get a medal

    Infidel - Looks like you need a bigger jacket to hide the too-mah

    Randy - Wide angle lens required

    Buck - Extra points for NW reference. More extra points for not making a Mount St. Helens ref.

    Odie - Guess I know what to get ya for x-mas

    Andy - Initials were RCD. Or was it RDC. Can't remember. He wanted Old English but I actually used Wedding Text as it has nicer capitals. Too bad his name was David U. Irving or something like that.


Family-friendly phrasing heartily encouraged.

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