Thursday, September 16, 2010

The question to everyone's answer

Question:  Why are my scars getting itchy lately?  Especially the one on my right shoulderblade and the one in my eyebrow where I had to get stitches after a mountain bike wipeout?  Am I going to die?

My Answer: Of course I am going to die.  I am not immortal.  At least not anymore.  I was for a while but then that whole Twilight thing happened.  It was all so ghey I felt compelled to renounce my vampirism and just go ahead and get old, as if I were just another normal person.  Didn't know that getting old would be so itchy, though.

Your Answer: ???
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Question:  Are the new Blogger Stats totally worthless?  The new Stats feature says this doggie post from back in June is getting about 6x as many views as anything else on my site.  Sitemeter shows no such activity.

My Answer:  Normally I'd come right out and say that Blogger Stats sucks.  But...  Has anyone ever given you that not-so-veiled threat "I know where you live"??  Well, Google really does know where I live.  And they know what I like to eat.  And what sites I visit.  And what scent of pitstick I prefer.  And, and, and...  So, um, nevermind...  Each and every one of Google's wonderful array of free services are Exquisitely McAwesome and worthy of highest praise.

Your Answer: ???
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Question:  I can't think of another question

My Answer:  I still can't get over how lame that new democrat logo is.  The crappyness of it consuming the entirety of my thoughtlife.  So much so that I can't even think of a third question.

Your Answer: ???

UPDATE:  Paul the Mean ol' Meany has some insights on the new demologo, too.   When viewing, use your imagination.  But don't use it TOO much.

9 comments:

  1. In reverse order;

    -The logo looks like a target to me and still wonder if they contracted Sarah Palin to design it.

    -Liars figure and figures lie. Stats makes no difference. It is the info and quality that counts.

    -The irratation will get more pronounced as November draws closer.

    ReplyDelete
  2. -The falling Autumn humidity causes those areas of flesh to dry unevenly, due to the change in elasticity of those scarred areas. I got one of them there bad boys on my left temple that is making me lose my damned mind right now.

    -Blogger stats say that I have gotten 4534 pageviews today. Statcounter says 2112 pageviews. I trust Statcounter.

    -I think that my take on the new Dem logo was the very same one that all other webbynetheads thought. Check out the top post on my blog.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Christopher - ya mean the itch is going to get worse?? GAHHH!

    Paul - I was just there and saw your take on the new demologo. I didn't think I could smile and cringe at the same time.

    ReplyDelete
  4. How do you think that it felt making it? I ruined a perfectly good shirt.

    ReplyDelete
  5. 1. The itchiness. I blame George Bush. Pray to Lord Obama and all will be well.

    2. Everyone is welcome in Google. Go into the Google my children.

    3. Well, the new horrible Dem logo is not as bad as the first choice: a steaming pile of crap. Though that would have been more honest.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Can't help out with the scars, but teh google? They seem to be slacking, after all, they have what, 90% of the market?

    ReplyDelete
  7. Paul - Yeah, democrats makes us all need a barf bib.

    Infidel - Soon All will be Google and Google will be All. And there was much rejoicing.

    Patti - Thanks, but I prefer topical punch. Especially when it comes in one of those little boxes I can stab with a straw.

    Matt - No worries. I didn't really want you messin' with my scars anyway... :)

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  8. Answer one: The itchiness is evil spirits trying to get out in time for the autumnal equinox. Drink heavily and apply leeches.

    Answer two: Blogger stats is not to be trusted. They lie to me worse than my toaster does.

    Answer three: If you think you can't get over the crappiness of the new Dem logo, just realize that that new logo is part of a marketing campaign that probably cost them more than $30,000. Oh wait, that just made it worse.

    ReplyDelete

Family-friendly phrasing heartily encouraged.

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