Tuesday, August 21, 2012

R R R R R R

Somewhere in Flyover Country, a campaign event is getting started...

Good afternoon, patriots of Topeka!
Or, as Sloe Joe Biden might say:
Ha! Nice impersonation Paul! Today we're unveiling our new campaign slogan: "R R R R R R"  It stands for Romney Ryan Republican Repeal Reform and...
Revenge! And when you say R R R R R R quickly, it kind of sounds like laughter.  Which is perfect, because stomping on democrats should provoke a good laugh, or at least a wry smile!
 Whoo!  Yay!  Alright! Reeevennnnggge!
But what about Todd Akin?  Are you rich 1% haters going to denounce him?
Let's look at what he said.  He, as a pro-lifer, was concerned that should abortion laws be changed, women who were ineligible for abortion would claim to have been raped, in order to make themselves eligible.
But what about the "legitimate rape" thing he said?
Looks to me like your face has been legitimately raped by a box of Crayolas!
Ha!  Burn!  Ryan 1, loser occutard 0!
Akin went on to say that women have some kind of Jedi Ninja powers to self-abort pregnancies due to rape.  That is almost as stupid as that Johnson guy thinking Guam might flip over.  So yes, I guess I do denounce him.
I prefaced my question with "rich 1% haters" and you seem to have stipulated that point when you answered in the affirmative.
Better watch it there, Mr. Gay Fawkes, you're gonna make him angry!
Try this on for size!
Oww!  I'm getting a headache!
[tears off shirt, revealing ripped 6-pack and big biceps]
 Yet.  But it will be.  It takes about 22 days to gestate.
Ha ha!  Stupid occutard can't fight the Cancer Ray!
That Akin is an ache in my wastegate.  He's gotta go.  As for rapists, I think they should be turned loose in the Wisconsin woods so my bowhunting buddies and I can inflict some 100gr broadhead revenge!
Revenge! Romney! Ryan! Republican! Reform! Repeal! REVENGE! Bwahahahaaa!

17 comments:

  1. In case the audio doesn't work for ya, the first is Robin Williams "Goooood Morning Vietnam!" and the second is Ahhnold saying "It's not a tumor!"

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  2. They didn't work. I'm tired of our guys falling on their swords and the piece of crap dems are never touched. I say Akin stay in. He blundered big, but oh well.

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    Replies
    1. In most cases, I'd agree with that sentiment. But McCaskill actually ran pro-Akin ads during the primary because he tends to be an idiot, and he was the only one she'd have a chance against. He probably should have never even been the nominee.

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    2. Actually, the Dems donated $1.5 million to his primary campaign. They really wanted him to win.

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    3. I know California politics and not Missouri ... oh they suck (Nancy Pelosi, Barbara Boxer, ans Dianne Feinstein)Big time. I'm tired of letting the left dictate to us what we do. We eat our own and we always will.

      The Dems (McCaskill) think they can beat conservatives. Let's prove them wrong!

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  3. Good post, Inno. The audio doesn't work for me.

    I've been out of the loop on this one, but heard this Akin guy for a couple of minutes yesterday afternoon on the way home from work. His stammering over the deal clearly shows that he hasn't thought through a really good explanation of it.

    I believe the guy when he says he's sorry for the way he said what he said. I understand the concept of "legitimate rape," as opposed to...whatever...and the guy seems sincere that he despises rape.

    Problem is that he's not very good at laying out exactly what he meant, and how his poor choice of words (and factual errors) have become a club to beat him with. I'm pretty sure he is a fine man, and would likely be...oh...about seven thousand times a better Senator than McCaskill.

    He's not dropping out. He's got to hope that some miracle worker can come along, and sharpen up a 'splainin' for him to use, because he's gonna keep getting hit.

    On the upside, people have short memories, and no matter how many times they are reminded of it by the McCaskill campaign, within a few weeks it will seem like it was twenty years ago to the average voter (maybe...mayabe not).

    Honesetly, I think Romney did himself a disservice by calling for the guy to step aside. I guess he had to.

    But, if it was me, I'd have gone with the old, "Missouri will decide if they want a conservative that made a stupid statement, or a stupid liberal that makes dangerous votes" deal.

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    1. I think he *could* have ridden this out if the other R's had held their fire. Now that everybody and his second cousin has called this guy out, I don't see how to make it work.

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    2. Probably right, Inno.

      We shall c.

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  4. BTW, the Occutard photo is a bit much.

    But back to Akin: it's a little-known fact that he was absolutely correct. He just had the whole species thing wrong. Ducks - in particular, mallards - are notorious for gang-rape. The hen, however, produces offspring only from her chosen mate.

    He could've minimized the damage if he'd just thought to say that he thought we were talking about ducks.

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  5. Oregon Ducks are known for the same thing. Go Beavers!

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    Replies
    1. As I understand it, the administration hired a PR firm so that the students at UC Nike could be coerced into accepting rape in exchange for a new student union building. At some point, they have to run low on their supply of exploding cigars.

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  6. It's like what Reagan said: http://kingshamus.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/avenge-me.png?w=532&h=189



    Great post, Inn.

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  7. This post is....wait for it....wait for it....

    RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAACCCCCCCCCCCCCIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSSTTTT!

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  8. Looks to me like your face has been legitimately raped by a box of Crayolas!
    Best. Line. Ever. Great post Inno.

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  9. Me? I'm ALL for revenge, and turning convicted rapists loose in the Wisconsin woods. Nekkid. In winter.

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  10. Cancer ray. Heh.

    REVENGE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  11. Fantastic Post! I'm all for revenge especially when it comes to getting even with the Democrats.

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Family-friendly phrasing heartily encouraged.

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